Liar Liar Pants on Fire

You know sometimes…just sometimes these phrases we used as kids are just so apt!
I mean liar liar pants on fire… is sometimes true frustration release!
Yes I have been recently confronted by more lies than usual from somebody who’s pants are on fire!!
You know those irritating clan of people…the ones who look you in the fface…with an annoyingly unwavering stare while lying so blatantly that you begin to wonder how much they question your intelligence!
And all u want to say to them is…

Cut the crap!

You know the types…

Me: Did you eat my chocolates?
Fire Pants: No
Me: Are you sure?
Fire Pants: Yes
Me: Then why are you holding on to the wrappers?
Fire Pants: I’m not.
Me: They’re right there in your right hand’s palm..that is now clenched..and sweaty!
Sweaty Fire Pants: Oh…oh that…this is just garbage…I was clearing the garbage.
Me: But the dustbin’s full.
Sweaty Fire Pants: Which is why the wrappers are in my hand see…no space in the bin.
Me: Are you MAD? Or do you think I am MAD! I know you ate my chocolates and now get your left hand off the last 2 boxes of After Eight and shut the refrigerator door now!!!

That’s when you’re 8yrs old and your brother’s a pain in the ass chocolate thief!


Today’s no different…but different circumstances…at work

Me: Why did you steal my work? That article is published with my quotes and your name? How?
Pinocchio Pants: Uh…no there’s been a mistake. The publishing house must have messed it up!
Me: Then how come I just saw you mail them saying “thank you, the article looks perfect!”
Pinocchio Nose Job Needed: Well that’s just coz it did look so perfect don’t you think…the layout…the pictures…no spelling mistakes…you know!
Me: Well what about omission and fact checking?? Unnecessary is it? Didn’t I work really hard for that…and now no credit??!! Oh and u….didn’t work at all…now I remember!
Pinocchio Center of Gravity Shifted: Of course I did. I did all the work by myself. That’s all my text in what’s printed. You had nothing to do with it! I deserve all the credit!
Me: I think you're losing balance…
Pinocchio Pants: (WHAM) ouch…ouch …ouch…I landed straight on my face…I lost my balance…my nose hurts….aaaaaaaaaarrrghhhhh and my pants are on fire….why are u laughing??????
Me: hahahahahaha!!