Thursday, March 27, 2008

maybe dogs can drive?

My brother in law recently discovered his driving license wasn’t as up to date as he or the traffic policeman, who caught him, would have liked it to be. The event of the expired license has him now prepping for his driving test.
The topic had me thinking…why these tests are more often than not considered a drag.
Well first of all for most of us superior intellect (or so we like to presume) individuals when there’s someone honking in the rear…or generally making a nuisance of themselves on the road we usually look into the rear view mirror thinking…



ASS!

Add to that the numerous mundane…
And perhaps not so mundane ...see below (I mean seriously what the hell does this road sign mean anyway??!! “Slow down…jack the ripper’s takin his overgrown kid to school??”)
road signs.

I like the idea of clear signs that are easy to interpret. Like these for example…


Now since we are on the topic of road signs…this one I find particularly helpful for all those expressways in India trying (in vain) to keep the non-four wheeler schmuck off!

Some signs perhaps when I am driving past...really fast (I swear I’m not rhyming on purpose!) I could misread…

wrong way???

But when it comes to signs….some basic ones really do the trick…



??? I mean what was this guy thinking?? That’s some high expectations from bulls! I mean first you expect them to read…n then also to keep out!?

All said and done I think this young enthusiasts being a little too hopeful if he thinks he’s about to get through a driving test…but then if bulls can read then maybe dogs can drive!

Reminds me of a rubics!

I like something about the rubics cube. All those colours in all that disorder…kind of reminds you of a kid that’s got the spunk enough to mess around with the art teacher’s palette. Didn’t you just hate it when they used to tell you, “Ok then, fill in the yellow there…no no…the red goes here!” Well ask my mum to show you my arts n crafts project n you will see teddy bears with green ears and purple eyes. Yeah notice how its so much easier to be experimental as a child?
It was always so easy to say “hey look no hands!!” and hey presto…you’re doing something utterly reckless and irresponsible that could have you go crashing against a less than soft/blunt something and have your facial features rearranged!
When I could have the nerve to do that incessantly as a child (my mum’s grey hair stands testimony to that) then why is it that as an adult I can’t find it in me to surrender to marriage?
It involves the same levels of recklessness. Your facial features also get rearranged in turns by the beautician (yes it takes a lot to make me look presentable!) and the photographer (he thanks photoshop developers everyday)!
So now you’re wondering how I went from the rubics cube to the topic of marriage?


Well even if you’re not I’ll still tell you.

My unassuming readers the concept of marriage is nothing but a rubics cube in camouflage. The more you screw things up the more difficult it is to fix it!

Some people have it figured so easy and the others (read as me) are certain to take ummm…a realllly lllong time.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

To Chennai ...with love!

Aaaah Chennai!! Well why ‘Life in a Metro’ was not based on Metro Chennai gets clarity in my head every passing day!
I have been in Chennai all of 15 days now and really although it might not seem so…I don’t have many complaints about the city. Only the sweltering heat that made my pores scream murder…the sweat smell…oops sweet smell of Chennai greeted me the second I stepped off the flight.
I was also always taught how sniggering at people and exchanging comments in a language alien to them is bad manners. I wonder how this was something that the people, in and around my residence, somehow managed to dodge from their parents teachings. My parents always ensured I had my manners to rote…but then again here I am blogging mean and anti communal comments!
Anyway getting back to where I was…whenever I leave the safety of my home I am subject to snigger snigger…tsk tsk...mumble jumble. In retrospect its quite entertaining for me coz it’s always nice to imagine your favourite cartoon characters in peoples contorted gossipy faces.
Ok now that I am dangerously close to convincing my readers that I don’t have a kind bone in me…I might as well tell you about what I do like about the city.
I can sum it up in one word…Ponnuswamy. No I am not fantasizing about a white mundu clad, handlebar mustached, pot bellied Tam Brahm (although now that I’v described him I wonder why not…sheer eye candy isn’t it!?)
I am however talking about a certain restaurant that specializes in the most delectable plant friendly (read as non vegetarian) cuisine. Chicken biryani is my staple diet and Ponnu’s restaurant better be extending me a heavy lifetime membership discount offer! But seriously it’s like the food there makes love to your taste buds and has you at climax by the time you swallow!

Oh n yeah about all the bad stuff I said at the outset…it cant be all that true coz I did bump into a Parsi family that had come down all the way from Cuffe Parade, Bombay to spend their Easter hols vacationing in Chennai! Surprisingly for me they looked as smug and satisfied as could be (but was that perhaps coz they were staying at the Taj Fisherman’s Cove Resort???)
Either way, I say cheers it is …to Chennai’s chicken!